Dear Blogger Mom:

I’d really love for you to tell me how you do this. Because, frankly, I don’t freaking know how you manage to keep posting perfect pictures of perfect meals day after day after day. I don’t. I am trying. I am. I try SO hard to cook original meals every night. I will happily admit, however, that I don’t do research to find out “what’s in”. I get that rainbow food is hot-hot-hot right now, but dangit, I don’t really have the time or the patience to lay all that crap out in perfect ROYGBIV order. You know why? Because 6 month olds don’t care if their food is ROYGBIV’d or not. They like it smashed up and in their mouths, thank you. And good luck getting my 3 year old to eat a purple potato. Just…good luck.

I love how the quality of your photos didn’t change one bit after you had kids. How’d you do that? Because my pictures….well, my pictures look like my 3 year old took them. It’s dark outside at dinnertime! Mama’s gotta use the flash! And yes, Joel bought me Lightroom for Christmas, but danged if I know how to use it! I’ve watched youtube videos but golly…this stuff is COMPLICATED! I have maybe 20-30 minutes of editing time each night and pretty bad ADD. Throw a glass or two of wine into the mix and we wind up with this scenario (try to imagine this in my voice, k?):

 

Edit, edit, edit…ok, this is going pretty good. ::sips wine:: 

Edit some more. Did I remember to cover Elliott up? What is this that Joel’s watching? Oh, some ridiculous Marvel show…WOAH THAT DUDE JUST GOT SHOT! This show is dumb.

Edit, edit, edit. ::sips wine:: You know what, I’m just gonna listen to some music while I work. Just to get the creative juices flowing. Man, I really love this new One Direction song. Everybody wanna steal my giiiiiiirl… Maybe I should preview the rest of their album. That won’t take long. Oooh, look, a youtube video about how two of them are secretly in love! I’ll just watch part of it. Wow, those guys are totally in love. Whoops, I just watched all 21 minutes of that video! Ok, Amy, FOCUS.

::sips wine:: Crap, I forgot to put the wet laundry in the dryer! Meh, I’ll just blog tomorrow…

 

See what I mean? I also love how you’re still able to put together those cool little lunches for your kids. You know, the little cups of hummus, the fresh-cut veggies, and the pizza with the cute faces on them? Super cute. My kid usually gets a pb&j or a grilled cheese. She hates hummus. Or like yesterday, how she only wanted two pieces of pita bread, some cherry tomatoes, and chocolate cake.

It’s really cool how you still find time to write thoughtful, interesting posts. My brain is so fried after 9 hours of wiping bottoms, cleaning dog vomit out of the carpet, brushing 8,000 tangles out of extremely curly hair, and getting everybody fed, cleaned up, pajama’d, teeth-brushed, bathed, read-to and sung-to, that I don’t have a single interesting thought left in my head. The only thing going through MY head at the end of the day is “MY BED! Haaaaaallelujah!” Even if I do have something interesting I’d like to sit down and type out right then (hey, it happens occasionally), as soon as I get the laptop turned on and type out ONE word, I hear the baby cry. Or Cass starts doing the pee-pee dance and it’s a mad dash to get to the potty in time. It’s amazing to me how you have carved out the time in your day to take time for this. Inspiring, really.

I also love those perfectly happy, content, smiling pictures you post on instagram, facebook, etc. of your happy babies. Or pictures of you and your kids doing some awesome craft together as a family. That’s cool. But you know what? I DON’T BUY IT. Not for one second. Nope. Those of you mom bloggers who just had babies, especially. I’m not buying for a single second that everything is as perfect and happy as it appears in your picture. I just went through the newborn phase and lemme tell ya- it sucked. Yes, of course there were so, so many of those happy, “I’m going to cry because I love you so much” moments. There were. But there were a lot more “I’m going to cry because I’m so dog tired and at this particular moment in time I pretty much want to strangle my husband and WHY WON’T THIS KID STOP SCREAMING AT ME?!” I get that nobody really wants to post those kinds of pictures on social media, but we all know they’re there. Even if you won’t admit it on your blog how tired you are. I know you are. It doesn’t mean we don’t love our babies and kids to absolute pieces…but I’m still not buying that things are as perfect as those perfect pictures you post on instagram.

And you know what? I’m pretty guilty of that too. I’ve been known to post a few “perfecthappyfamily” pictures here and there. Usually before all hell breaks loose and I end up with glitter literally covering my kitchen floor and my toddler’s hands.

I don’t mean for this letter to sound as snarky as it’s coming across. Really. I guess I just really get down on myself for my lack of motivation to actually sit down and make this stuff happen. I just don’t know how you do it, is all. Granted, my ad revenue fell to like, peanuts. My monthly checks went from a nice, hefty amount to…womp, womp. I know a lot of you make a LOT more money than me, so it’s more like an actual job for you to blog. You wouldn’t just skip out on your well-paying job, I get that. I guess I’m still just baffled at how you find the time for all this. Like, really- HOW DO YOU DO IT? Could you help a sister out and give me your secret? Nanny? Live-in maid? What? Maybe I’ll never know. Maybe I’ll never get on top again. Maybe my blog will just quietly drift off into obsoleteness. I’m pretty much there already. I don’t want to be, but nevertheless, I can’t seem to get into the groove again.

So, I guess just think of me…think of me tonight, while you’re posting beautiful pictures of beautiful meals. Because I’ll be right there with you, drinking wine, getting sucked into some dorky tv show, listening to boy bands, and trying, by gosh, to actually get something posted before I become completely irrelevant. Ugh. Send prayers. And wine.

Sincerely,

Crazy, maxed out, washed up blogger lady

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29 Comments »

  1. Hugs, Amy! Being a mom blogger is certainly overwhelming! And while I definitely don’t fall into the superhuman mom blogger persona, I am a mom who blogs. I try to take pictures when my child is playing and write posts after she goes to bed. I don’t do much editing to photos – maybe 2 minutes’ worth? And I blog for me. Not for the money (because I only make pennies), but as a hobby. My family is much more important than the 3 readers I have. I don’t think I’ll ever become a big-time famous blogger or write a cookbook, but I’m OK with that because I think I’m a pretty good mom and wife. And that’s what matters.

    [Reply]

    amy Reply:

    Well-said. Thank you!

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    Comment by Eva @ Eva Bakes — January 26, 2015 @ 9:55 AM

  2. Amy, I love this post. I could have written it myself because I’ve often wondered the same things that you do! You’re a great mom, wife and blogger and there’s always, always more going on behind the scenes that readers never know about. 🙂

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    amy Reply:

    Very true! Thanks for your sweet comment.

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    Comment by Rachel — January 26, 2015 @ 11:33 AM

  3. Oh Amy! Lots of virtual hugs! My blog started off as a food blog, but after having my daughter (after having 3 boys) turned elegant pin-worthy pics of dinner into hot dogs and hot dogs and pizza. Add in grocery prices soaring, and we’re not eating anything interesting either! You need to take time for YOURSELF. The blog will still be here when you get that “perfect” dish. <3

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    amy Reply:

    Thank you so much!

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    Comment by Shawnda — January 26, 2015 @ 1:48 PM

  4. I loved it. It made me laugh so hard and smile til my cheeks hurt. I only wonder the same thing too. I don’t have it in me to blog, volunteer at school, lead a bible study or home school. I’m a single working mom. Although there is nothing wrong with doing any of those things I just don’t want that crazy chaotic life. I’m all for less is more. God bless the ones that do it all.

    [Reply]

    amy Reply:

    I respect the crap out of single working moms! Keep on keepin’ on!

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    Comment by catherine — January 26, 2015 @ 2:41 PM

  5. what a hilarious, fantastic and honest post! Keep it real, girl, keep it real:) so many bloggers do not.

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    amy Reply:

    Word. I’ll do my best!!

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    Daphne Reply:

    I agree! I appreciate the bloggers that show what it is really like. I do love to look at pretty homes but let’s face it…that is not what it is really like. 🙂

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    Comment by June G. — January 26, 2015 @ 4:39 PM

  6. Love you super awesome blogger mommy. Awesome post.

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    amy Reply:

    Thanks girl. Love you too!

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    Comment by Krystal — January 27, 2015 @ 12:06 AM

  7. You sound totally normal to me (especially needing the wine)! I think that 99% of the bloggers out there with beautiful pics of their homes and kids are 100% hiding the laundry that has been piling up for 3 days, dishes (including THEIR wine glasses from the night before) and piles of papers everywhere…I bet their messes are just out of sight from that beautiful Instagram pic. Hang in there…these days will soon pass. You are doing great!

    [Reply]

    amy Reply:

    Amen! And thank you!

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    Comment by Daphne — January 27, 2015 @ 1:35 PM

  8. I’m not a blogger. I know nothing about blogging. I do know that when I had a baby and toddler, I was a mess for the first year or so. All over the place trying to figure things out. I commend you for what you are able to do and look forward to your posts. Having said all of that, I came across this today and thought that maybe it might help?
    http://www.brilliantbusinessmoms.com/busy-blogger-finds-balance-crystal-paine/

    [Reply]

    amy Reply:

    Thanks Heather! I always know I can count on you for encouragement and support!

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    Comment by Heather R — January 27, 2015 @ 2:47 PM

  9. I have totally felt what you are feeling! The struggle is real! I was super close to quitting my blog last summer. The only way I’ve found to make it work is to try and blog/edit photos during nap times. My main time for making new recipes is on the weekends where my husband is home and can watch Sophie and then I make several new things so I have a bit of a backlog of posts. Or I will make meals ahead of time and photograph them while there is good light and then reheat them for dinner. Sometimes that’s why I do lots of baking recipes also, because I can make those during nap time and photograph them after my daughter wakes up (the best light is in her room-go figure!) Hang in there! I’ll be praying for you!
    Oh also-my daughter definitely eats the same things everyday (like cheese & pb crackers), no cute little lunches and hardly any veggies in sight! She won’t really eat them and during the week I cook super simple. Thanks for your transparency on this post!

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    amy Reply:

    Glad to know I’m not alone! I’m glad you didn’t quit, though! Thanks for the encouragement, Stephanie!

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    Comment by Stephanie @ Macaroni and Cheesecake — January 27, 2015 @ 3:15 PM

  10. I just want to say that I love your blog BECAUSE it’s not perfect. Yours is the kind of stuff I can throw together in the half an hour that my four month old is napping while trying to keep my house semi-neat for when my MIL “drops-by” without calling first. I LOVE that I can totally relate to you.

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    amy Reply:

    That’s a very familiar scenario! Thanks for the encouragement! It means so much!

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    Comment by Sarah — January 29, 2015 @ 11:40 AM

  11. AMEN, sister! Honestly, I just went cold turkey and quit (as evidenced by my blog if you click over). When DS was younger, napping and STTN reliably (We were one of the lucky ones! Don’t hate me, please!) I was able to sneak in post here or there if I was *really* motivated. But when it came time for me to go back to my real full time day job, I was like…Um. No. After taking care of a little person, working all day, cooking for our family, getting him to bed on time so he didn’t wake 13390324290 times from being overtired, I was just done. So what if my readership and (already scanty) revenue died? So what if I don’t get cool blogger swag anymore? In the end, my sanity and spending time with my family was so much more important to me. So don’t feel bad. For every mommy blogger out there that seems to live this seemingly perfect life, there’s at least 10 more out there like you and me ;).

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    amy Reply:

    Well-said! Thanks for that!

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    Comment by Christine @ Christine's Kitchen Chronicles — January 29, 2015 @ 7:42 PM

  12. I hear you!
    I have a full time job, a 3 year old and an almost 1 year old.

    I cut myself a lot of slack. Posting 3 times a week wasn’t making me happy. So I cut back.

    I could happily post pics of “oatmeal for dinner, again” or “mac n cheese” as well as “rummage in the fridge babe, find leftovers!” and the old favourite “throw frozen things in oven and pull out and call it dinner”

    But I don’t.
    Life is crazy and a bunch of fun, and I try to see blogging as a hobby, not an obligation (or where’s the fun, and the point?)

    [Reply]

    amy Reply:

    Ha! Exactly! If people were actually interested in that, I could post some “great” pictures of grilled cheese, mac-n-cheese, and cereal! 🙂 Keep doing what you’re doing, girl! You’re awesome!

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    Comment by Kylee — January 30, 2015 @ 11:49 AM

  13. Ahh I love this! I barely have time to READ blogs anymore let alone work on my own…hence the fact that I’m commenting on your post that you wrote a week ago. 😉

    Keep on, keep on mama, you’re doing great! 🙂

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    Comment by Chrissy — February 7, 2015 @ 8:06 PM

  14. Honestly, I think YOU have blogging down. Pinterest has made it so pressure-filled to have perfect photos, the perfect blog, high views, etc. But some of us still do this for fun. And when it’s fun, you take the pressure off. It makes it so that you can snap that adorable photo of the kids covered in glitter or the dog with mud on her nose and then just blog later. We still love what you post, when you do. 🙂

    [Reply]

    amy Reply:

    Aww, thanks, Kim. You are always so sweet and encouraging! And you’ve got a great blog as well! Keep up the great work!

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    Comment by Kim (Feed Me, Seymour) — March 12, 2015 @ 10:59 AM

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